Greg and Jim (and Oberon makes three!)

Jim and I arrived at the house late in the afternoon. It was somewhat cloudy, but I was amazed at how green everything was even with the drought they're having up there. I lived in CT for about a year back in the early 90's, and had forgotten how gorgeous it is in New England.


When we arrived at the house, we were greeted by Oberon, Greg and Jim's 17-year old cat.

Oberon, 17 years old

Yes, I said SEVENTEEN! His brother, Orlando, has died, but Oberon seems to be doing well for his age. Of course, the fact that his parents keep a log so they can keep up with his extensive health care treatments and the fact that they are diligent in providing said treatments has a lot to do with Oberon's continued quality of life.


Every other day, Oberon gets hydrated intravenously (the benefit of having my uncle, who is an M.D., as one of his parents) and every other day they give him an appetite stimulant. He also gets his blood sugar checked regularly, and is on Lantus, the same insulin my roommate takes for diabetes.


Clearly, all of this makes a huge difference, because at 17 (the equivalent of a 90+ year old man) Oberon gets around better than a lot of cats half his age. He loves to go out in the yard and pretend that he's stalking prey, and, like any cat, he enjoys sunning himself on the deck or near a window. He also enjoys fresh water, right out of the tap!

Ahhh! So refreshing!

Oberon is proof positive that Greg and Jim are very loving people. When Oberon was in the animal hospital not too long ago, Greg would stop by and spend time with him every day on the way home from work. Sometimes I think their love is what keeps Oberon alive more than the IV's and insulin.


Greg and Jim live in a beautiful home, which is outdone only by the view it provides. It's a gorgeous house, but it's not pretentious at all. It is so clearly an expression of both Jim and Greg's personalities - comfortable and stylish with lots of personality and very welcoming. Jim puts a lot of effort into making sure things run smoothly around there, and Greg is the head of the techno-electronics aspects of the house, including the awesome movie room downstairs. Later in the evening, Greg and I went to Walmart so Greg could replace a wireless router, making Jim a very happy camper since he runs an internet business and hadn't had internet access at the house for a few days.

Chez Greg, Jim, and Oberon

There are many windows in the house, which allow for a wonderful view of the mountains in the distance. I really don't think I've ever just sat still and stared off into the distance like I did while I was there. It was the most relaxing, peaceful weekend I've had in years.

Stress Therapy

I stayed downstairs, where there are no windows, and where anyone with a sleep disorder can be quickly cured. It's so quiet, and completely dark with the lights off, you can't help but sleep. I think I got more rest there in a few days than I typically get in two weeks!

Oberon has the right idea!

Greg and Jim have been together for 20+ years now, yet they weren't able to get married until last year, thanks to some ridiculous, antiquated, freedom-restricting ideas so many in our government have yet to evolve out of their pre-historic minds. These two are a more loving, mainstream, middle-of-the-road, community-enriching couple than any other I've ever known. They have their differences, but they seem to have mastered the art of compromise, and even though their personalities are very different, they seem to compliment one another quite well.

Jim is 72, and looks like he's in his 50's. Greg is 54 I believe. I met Jim more than 20 years ago, and I think he looks better now than he did back then! The two of them have really begun to look a lot alike. Most people mistake them for brothers.

Greg on the Left, Jim on the Right
20+ years together!

Greg and I reconnected and got caught up on the past 20 years or so. We discussed the need to remove ourselves from the family at times (many years, in my case) and how my father seemed to be just on the verge of figuring out who he was when he got sick and died.

We had the kind of family that can swallow you up and leave you without an identity of your own, especially if you happen to be the kind of person who tries to keep everyone happy by being who they want you to be. There were some toxic people who could be quite cruel back then. Now that they are gone, the family waters seem much safer to navigate.

Greg is probably the only living family member who "gets" me. I'm a lot like my father in ways that some in the family never realized, but I had forgotten how alike Greg and I are as well, as different as he and my dad were. Now that my grandfather is married off, Greg and Jim will have less on their plate, and may be moving to New Zealand in a year or two. That really sucks since Greg and I are just now reconnecting, but I suppose these days with Facebook, email, and texting, it's easier to stay in touch across the globe than it used to be from across the street. Either way, I'm happy for Greg and Jim that they can have some freedom after years of looking after my grandparents and making sure my grandmother was well cared for as her illness progressed. They've definitely earned it!

Next: Wedding Rehearsal